pdawn_c's Xanga

Good Vs. Insurrectionists

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 18:28:36 GMT

My husband and I were discussing our children the other day and how they behave or not during church. Our 18-month-old prefers to wander the pews rather than sit quietly on my lap, and when the nursery is closed, it can be quite difficult to "make her behave." First of all, let me comment on a closed nursery: That is insane! How can a church hope to accommodate visiting families if this ministry is not available! there is a larger problem to solve regarding this issue.
I have gone through many transitions in my own view of whether or not infants and children should be present during a church service. When Avery was young, I was adamant about her remaining with me to experience church and learn. Yet, Avery was a unique child; she was able to sit quietly and color while the adults did their thing. I do not truly believe she was learning, but I felt she was better able to experience church rather than go with a babysitter and yell and run with other children. Once Roman was born, I began to see two things. First, more than one child requires an amount of attention that I am not able to provide and experience "worship" as I should or could if I was not distracted by the demands of my children. Second, Roman is his own person. He is not interested in sitting quietly.
Now that we have THREE children, it is impossible for me to attend church with them and get fed anything whatsoever. I also feel pressure to make them behave and not speak for the hour or so that the church service lasts. Most people have said, "We love seeing your kids in church. They are such a blessing." but I have also read anonymous notes on the tabs, "Doesn't this church have a nursery?" (See above; it's closed!)
What is a parent to do in this situation? I realize that church is a formal occasion, and children do not normally belong at such events. But I also know Jesus said to let the little children come to him. Do you think he meant during church? Only during the children's sermon or the entire service? How can we make our church services more child-friendly and still create an experience of worship for all? Is that even possible?
For me, I want my children to grow into healthy, responsible adults who are not afraid to be insurrectionists. I don't think I want them to grow up to be "good" people. Bryan and I were talking about Gandhi, and how he changed his world and India. Was he a good person? Does it even matter if he was? He made life better because he knew injustice was wrong, and he was not afraid to suffer for what he believed.
Maybe my children are not good, but they make the other people (mostly) smile with their childish antics. They run up to others with open arms and loving embraces. They seek out the ones they know for special time on their laps. My children can change the world by being themselves, and I do not think they are overstepping their boundaries.

Some limited free time

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 17:03:42 GMT

I had some free time this afternoon, which rarely happens these days, so I thought I'd post something. What do you want to know? :o)
We are not back home yet, but hope to be there the end of next week. I cannot believe how long this process has taken. We have learned some valuable lessons from our experience, but we will all be glad to return to the comfort of our home. The fun is just beginning!
The kids are doing well in school, though Roman has had some adjusting issues. Who can blame him? It's been a crazy two months; I've had some of my own issues! He now gets to give the class rabbit a treat if he waves to me through the window and doesn't cry. He's been asking me lately why we have to go to school all the time. I tell him its so we can learn, but sometimes I doubt my own answer. Oh well, simple is better right now.
Mazie is chattering up as much as she can. She's been saying pumpkins whenever she sees something orange. Too cute! I am really enjoying all of her stages, and I wish I could be around her more often. Again with the school all the time....
I'm doing well in school, too. I absolutely love my classes. It's been an interesting discovery process for me, and I wonder if this will happen each time I experience a new/different class. Frequently, I find myself questioning what it is I am supposed to do in my life. I still do not know. Then I find something new that I greatly enjoy and my ideas change. It can be so frustrating! And invigorating! Maybe I need to stop pondering the future and simply enjoy my time in class. But that isn't me; I can't help but think about how I can apply my knowledge to my life.

two week recap

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 19:35:58 GMT

On the eve of Aug. 20, 2009, the first day of school, we had a small fire in our basement. It appeared as not much at the time, considering nothing was structurally damaged, but in fact, Bryan's entire studio is ruined and the rest of the house has a thin layer of sticky soot on it. While the insurance companies battle out the bids with the cleaning companies, our belongings are being boxed up and taken to an off-site cleaning location. We now have no furniture in our main living space. Beds, yes; couches, etc., no.
My classes began on Monday, Aug. 24, 2009, and everything was going on at our house. Bryan had things mostly under control, what control he was able to use. I figured I could handle five classes, 13 semester hours; no big deal.
Roman began school on Monday, Aug. 31, 2009. He loves it, though a couple of mornings were rough. Yesterday was really good; he opened up to his teacher and showed his bubbly personality while they discussed chalkboards and chalk.
This morning, Bryan stated his midsection was not feeling the best, but he did not feel nauseated. I insisted he phone the on-call nurse and have her help him diagnose the problem. We could not afford to have him out sick while trying to juggle three kids and my classwork. She said his symptoms sounded a bit serious; we must go tot he emergency room. I quickly called our neighbor whose son is in Avery's class; Avery went there before school. we took Roman to school, and then headed to the ER.
Bryan was exhibiting classical appendicitis symptoms, so they wanted to do a CT scan and have the surgeon take a look at him. He had to drink this purple goo (yuck!) and wait for the scan. As soon as he drank the goo, though, the surgeon said there was no need to do the scan; he definitely needed surgery. Poor, Bryan!
while this was happening, I was on the phone trying to reach someone to come get Mazie so I could hang out with Bryan in peace. I was going to move my car so i would not have to pay all day rates. When I got to my car, I realized I had $1 and a flat tire. Thankfully, my dear friend Brenda answered her phone and said she would be right over. One message I left for Jenny was returned; she was actually at the hospitals anyway. She came right over too. The three of us tried our best to change the tire, but we needed the help of Strong Chris. The ladies sent me back inside while they took care of the car and Mazie.
Now it has been four hours and we are still waiting for the surgery. A trauma came in just as Bryan was going downstairs, so we are not sure what time the surgery will happen. It doesn't look like he will be released tomorrow as expected. I am doing my best to not worry, but I'm not sure what I will do about classes while Bryan is in recovery. We will be staying at someone else's house because all of our belongings are now in boxes so the floors and walls can be cleaned. Anyone want to nanny while I'm in class?

Last Week of Summer

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 16:56:22 GMT

Has it really been three months of summer? Amazing. Now that I have a child in school, and I am back in school instead of at work, summers fly by much more quickly than I remember them doing in the past. we have been ridiculously busy, but I think it has been good for the most part. I have greatly enjoyed my time at home, even on the days when I didn't think I could take another second of sibling rivalry.
This afternoon we register Roman for his preschool. He is very excited. He wants so much to be a big kid like Avery. I am excited for him but also a little sad that he is growing up. This parenting sure is bitter-sweet.
Mazie is toddling and babbling all over the place. And so proud of herself, too. I love this stage, though it does present a little extra attention from me. She will be the only child at home for most of the time this year. I am not sure how I feel about that. I think it will make things so much easier to do the extra stuff when I only have to care for one instead of three. Strange...Roman did not get to experience being the only one at home. well, he got two days a week, I guess. It is amazing how each of their life experiences has been so vastly different and will continue to be so.

I have been reading the Twilight series. I had heard so many mixed reviews about these books, that I really wasn't sure what to expect. I think my opinion is that they are a great female/teen romantic/fantasy series. The writing leaves some to be desired, but I think it conveys the thought process of a teenage girl rather well. How many of us truly think in complete sentences or have thoughts that really make sense? And it is a unique twist on vampires. it is really easy to read; one recommendation said it was like reading candy. It has been fun to read another mindless fantasy story during my last week of summer.

Video doesn't do it justice

Sat, 25 Jul 2009 17:30:20 GMT

Sometimes, video and pictures just do not capture the moments of childhood joys. This morning I realized that every 6 year old is a director at heart, especially when there are younger siblings available. Avery and Roman are playing "Superman Saves the Princess." Avery, wearing her princess dress, directs Roman to perform the prince duties in Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty. Roman, wearing his Superman costume, tries his best to be Prince Charming.

Roman: (running through the house) "Sweeping Booty, Sweeping Booty; I'll save you, Sweeping Booty."
Avery: (sitting on the couch with one slipper on) "Pretend you dropped the slipper. Roman, drop it! Good. Now, pretend you said, 'Oh no!' Roman. Roman! Say, 'Oh no!' Ok. Now pretend you put the slipper on my foot. Not that foot! The one that is in the air! Nevermind. Just stand there. (She takes the slipper and puts it on herself.) It fits!" (stands. sounds of clomping slippers as she leaves the room.)
Roman: (chasing her) "Hooray!"

I think we have a Best Screenplay in the making. :o)

Introducing

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 14:38:17 GMT

Thomas Merrill Clark, or Tommy, the newest addition to our family.

Here is Avery getting out of the car to pick him up from the animal shelter.

Here we are signing the paperwork. This is the "office" cat, another one available for adoption.

Of course, we need to buy some kitty litter and food. And at least one toy!

Tommy did great in his carrier. He was a little anti-social; here's his tail.

The kids with Tommy in the car.

The kids watched a movie with the babysitter. This is how we found them when we got home.

In honor of our new kitty, we read "The Curious Little Kitten." Tommy is part of the family now!

A Look at the Mission Trip

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 21:31:23 GMT

Here you go!

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 01:56:51 GMT

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Sat, 27 Jun 2009 23:44:26 GMT

We all survived the time apart and the reunion that came with returning. For the most part, none of us really missed each other. Go figure!
We celebrated a couple birthdays this past week. Bryan and Mazie are both one year older and loving life. She is now 29 1/2 inches long and weighs 23 pounds. She is quite the climber now, and can manage the stairs quickly and efficiently. She has also begun to babble, which is just too cute. I made some videos of her, but they won't upload at this time. I'll try again later.
Another thing we are considering is adding one more member to the family. Avery has been talking about a kitten for the past year and a half, so we finally took some time today to go to the local animal shelter to meet the animals and ask about adoption. Take a look at one possiblity...

I left my children

Sat, 13 Jun 2009 01:11:37 GMT

This afternoon I left my children with their grandfather. I hugged and kissed them all and then walked out the door, down the stairs, and got into the car. I know I will be back to get them in eight days, but that was probably the most difficult thing I have ever done.
It was nice to not have to share my meal at dinner, but I was not able to eat it all.
I felt like babies and pregnant women were following me. I kept seeing them everywhere.
When we got home, Bryan rang the doorbell for Roman (he likes to do that now that he is tall enough to reach it.) I noticed all the little things they had left out, the toys in the guest room, the dinosaur on the counter. Roman's accomplishment sticker chart for going potty was on the wall of the bathroom. He had even forgotten his M&M; it was still on the counter.
I stood there thinking that, as nice as it was not to hear arguing and crying, I missed my kids. I like having them around. I have not been without a child for the past seven years, except for one weekend when Roman was six months old and we went to a cabin for the weekend. All other times, I have either had a baby in my arms or my womb. This is the first time since Bryan and I have been married that we have been without children.
I guess that will all end tomorrow when we load up the van with 21 teens. But, still, they are not ours; we are not their parents. We just get to go hang out with them for the week and watch out that no one injures themselves too badly.
I do not know if I will survive the "empty nest" when that time comes. I am definitely not ready for it to happen any time soon. I love being a mom. I love my children. I missed them before I had even said good bye.